Sardines
by kreepinprice
Summary: The Elders of District 9 decide to play a game of Sardines and end up packed into a closet and Kevin can't keep his hands to himself.


'Ow, that's my foot!'

'This is really uncomfortable...'

'Who's touching my face?'

'Get your arm out of my ribcage!'

Situations like this one usually came about because of someone's boredom. That someone was usually Arnold Cunningham and this occasion was no different. Elder Cunningham had managed to persuade the Elders of District 9 to play a game of Sardines. Now half an hour into the game, five of them were crammed into the wardrobe in the spare room.

'Who's actually in here?' a voice piped up from the back of the closest. The voice belonged to Elder Thomas, who had been the person elected to find the hiding place in the first place.

'I am!' a group of voices all chorused at the same time.

'Nevermind...'

'Shh! If you keep talking, they'll find us!' whispered Elder Church, from the corner of the cupboard.

'Oh that's _you_ in the corner, Elder Church!' the surprised tone of Elder Neeley spoke out - he was greeted with a tirade of shhing.

They all stood in silence for a moment before they heard the door to the spareroom creek open and footsteps approach the door.

'It's about to get even more cramped,' muttered Elder Schrader, who was currently squished between Elder Neeley and Elder Thomas.

'I'm gonna fall out when that door opens,' mumbled Elder McKinley, his voice muffled due to the fact his face was pressed up against the back of the wardrobe door.

Sure enough, when the door was pulled open, McKinley tumbled out, knocking over the tall figure of Elder Price onto the floor.

'I thought I could hear people in here!' Price said, triumphant. His statement was greeted with hushing.

'You've got to hide with us now, so shh!' said McKinley. He quickly got up, and helped Elder Price up too, before both hopping into the closet and shutting the door.

The increased number of people immediately took its toll on everyone inside the wardrobe.

'James, can you move to the side a bit? My arm hurts!'

'I can't move any further - I'm already in the corner!'

There was a bit of shuffling around before a pained cry from Elder Thomas.

'Will you stop treading on my feet?!'

'I can't exactly see your feet, can I?' whispered an irritated Elder Schrader.

'Ok boys, settle down,' Connor spoke up from the front of the cramped space. 'I think we need to arrange ourselves a little better - let's try standing in a line, one in front of another.'

There was a murmur of agreement from everyone and they began to shuffle around again, with the occasional grunt of pain or annoyance.

Eventually they managed to create a line inside the wardrobe.

'This is so much better!' said Elder Neeley, who was now sandwiched between Elder McKinley and Elder Schrader.

'Enjoy it while it lasts - when the next person finds us it won't be so cosy..' muttered Elder Schrader, darkly.

'You alright there, Elder Price?' Connor said over his shoulder to where Kevin was standing with his back to the wall of the closet.

'Sure thing, Elder McKinley!' Price whispered, causing Connor to shiver as he felt Kevin's breath on the back of his neck.

The Elders fell silent. The only noises they could hear were each other's breathing.

'Gosh, it's really hot in here,' Elder Thomas mumbled from somewhere near the front of the line.

'No kidding, Chris - we're packed into a wardrobe in Uganda, of course it's hot!' James tutted.

Connor agreed with his companion - it was slowly becoming an oven inside the wardrobe. He was about to add his two cents to the whispered conversation James and Chris were having, when he felt two hands on his hips, and he gasped.

'You alright, Elder McKinley?' Elder Neeley asked.

'Yeah, yeah, I'm fine - I agree that it is very hot in here!'

Connor tried to bat Kevin's hands away, only to have Kevin's hands entwine fingers with Connor's. Connor gave up, figuring that a bit of hand holding wouldn't hurt - it wasn't like anyone could see them. He and Kevin had had a thing going on for a couple of weeks, but had so far neglected to tell anyone else. He was pretty sure that Nabulungi knew, but she was fine about it. They'd kept it very low key - hand holding when they knew no one was looking, stolen kisses in the morning before everyone else was up. They'd occasionally sit up at night and watch a film, but not on a regular basis as it meant both parties were hazy and unfocused the next day.

The wardrobe was quiet once more. Kevin rested his chin on Connor's shoulder. Connor tensed, but when Kevin did nothing else he relaxed, leaning his own head against Kevin's. Every time Kevin exhaled air, a shiver shot down Connor's spine, but Connor didn't feel like telling him to move any time soon.

Kevin was grateful for his position in the closet. In the darkness, he could show Connor the affection that he wanted to in the daylight. There were definitely perks to being jammed into a wardrobe with six other people. He gently planted a kiss on the redhead's neck, smirking slightly when he heard Connor's breath hitch.

'Not here,' Connor breathed, only just loud enough so that Kevin could hear him.

'Why not? No one can see us...' Kevin responded, just as quietly.

'They might hear...'

'I can be quiet,' Price said, a sly tone to his lowered voice.

'Yes, well, _some_ of us aren't quite so-' Connor was cut off by Elder Neeley shuffling slightly. Connor froze, worried that the boy in front had heard the conversation between him and Price. Thankfully, Elder Neeley did not say anything and Connor relaxed.

Kevin knew that he really shouldn't try anything else - he had learned that Connor had the potential to be quite vocal which would give them away for sure. However, Kevin was finding it somewhat hard to hold back - the fact that he and Connor were pressed up really close wasn't helping.

'Why is it taking everyone else so long to find us?' whined James from the other side of the closet. 'The mission hut isn't even that big!'

'I bet they've forgotten to look for us,' grumbled Elder Schrader, who hadn't wanted to play sardines in the first place and was resenting his current position.

Under the cover of the other's voices, Kevin decided to take a chance and leaned forward once again and captured Connor's earlobe between his teeth. Connor immediately gasped, tightening his grip on Kevin's hands. Kevin allowed his tongue to flick across Connor's ear, eliciting more noises from the redhead. As Kevin licked the shell of the ear, Connor let out a particularly noticeable squeak which alerted the rest of the wardrobe.

'Who was that?' asked Chris, alarmed.

'I think it was Elder McKinley!' Elder Neeley chimed in.

If Connor's face had been visible, everyone would have seen the shocking shade of red he had turned.

'Sorry, I trod on his foot!' Kevin said, before Connor could say anything. Connor was relieved for Kevin's cover up and added,

'I'd appreciate it if you keep your feet to yourself, Elder Price!' McKinley scolded, going along with the charade. This seemed to satisfy the other elders who said nothing more. Connor gave Kevin's foot a light kick, which was code for 'stop it, you're going to get us caught'. Kevin didn't like to be kicked, so in retaliation he bit down lightly on the back of Connor's neck. Connor gasped in surprise, kicking Kevin's foot again.

'Elder Price, are you treading on Elder McKinley's feet again?' Elder Neeley asked upon hearing Connor cry out again. Kevin detached himself from Connor's neck to reply, 'No - I think it's just the heat getting to him, right Elder McKinley?'

Connor cursed inwardly, making a reminder to himself to deal with Elder Price after this game was over. 'Haha, yes... the heat...' Connor muttered through gritted teeth. He turned his head sideways to face Kevin and in a barely audible whisper said, 'Control yourself, Kevin, or so help me I will...'

'Yes...?' Kevin said, a hint of a smirk in his voice.

'Ugh, nevermind...' Connor turned his head back to the front, rolling his eyes. Kevin was such a child when he couldn't have what he wanted.

Kevin accepted that for now, enough was enough and contented himself with wrapping his arms around Connor's waist and resting his head on his shoulder.

A few more minutes past before the elders in the closet heard the familiar creek of the spareroom door and footsteps entering the room. By the sound of it, it was more than one person.

'Sounds like they've teamed up,' breathed Chris.

'Thank Heavenly Father - if that's all four of them then the game's finished and we don't have to spend another second in this gosh darned wardrobe,' Elder Schrader muttered.

Meanwhile, at the back of the line, Kevin was getting restless again and was gently nibbling Connor's ear. Connor was trying his best to suppress any squeaks that might escape his mouth - but luckily the rest of the wardrobe was too busy trying to listen to the people outside the cupboard to notice Connor's erratic breathing.

The footsteps stopped and voices could be heard - amongst which was the recognizable laugh of Elder Cunningham.

'We've searched everywhere else - this is the last place they could be!' Arnold announced. 'We know you're in there!'

The elders in the wardrobe held their breath - except for Kevin who was still ravaging Connor's ear much to Connor's simultaneous pleasure and annoyance.

After a moment of tension the doors to the wardrobe flew open to reveal Arnold grinning triumphantly, flanked by the remaining Elders. Kevin swiftly pulled his head back and removed his arms from around Connor's waist, praying that no one had noticed.

'Found you all!' Arnold shouted, gleefully.

'Can we come out now?' asked Elder Schrader. 'Since you four are the only remaining players, there's no point in you hiding with us.'

Arnold looked around to Elder Michaels, Elder Davis and Elder Zelder who were standing behind him. 'Oh yeah, you're right!'

The wardrobe elders breathed a collective sigh of relief and spilled out of the closet into the spare room. As they did, Connor straightened his shirt, and tried to calm the furious blush on his cheeks.

'Who's up for another game?' Arnold enthused, bouncing up and down with excitement.

'No!' Elder Schrader shouted, practically running out of the room, followed swiftly Chris and James.

'Sorry, Elder Cunningham - I guess being stuck in a boiling hot closet for nearly half an hour got to them!' said Elder Neeley, apologetically, patting Arnold on the shoulder.

'Maybe we should go watch a movie?' suggested Kevin.

'That sounds like a great idea, Elder Price!' Connor said, district leader mode activated, though he was unable to look Kevin in the eye.

'Fine, we'll watch a movie...' grumbled Arnold, who had been all set for another round of sardines. 'Only if I get to choose!'

'Sure, sure,' Connor chuckled, ushering the other elders out of the spare room.

'Yes!' Arnold fist-pumped and was the last out of the room. Connor let Arnold pass and then turned back with the intention of shutting the door.

'Hey, Elder McKinley?'

Connor turned to face Arnold. Everyone else had traipsed through to the living room and Arnold and Connor were left alone in the hallway. 'Yes, Arnold?'

'Sorry about making you play that game...'

'Pardon?'

'I'm sorry about making you play sardines...'

Connor was mystified. 'Why are you apologising - it was fun!'

'I was apologising 'cos you hurt yourself!' Arnold's tone was concerned.

'Hurt myself? I have no idea what you're talking about, Elder Cunningham!' Elder McKinley shook his head in exasperation.

'You've got a really big bruise on the back of your neck!'

Connor froze. He was going to kill Kevin Price.


End file.
